This weeks Trifecta Challenge the third definition, which, in this case, is fairly specific.
BLACK
3: dressed in black
Close The Book
Satin and lace splinters the air
a toreador’s cape, a suicidal Paso Doble,
dancing with the unseen,
alone on the hilltop – fearless and free.
Dressed in black, she closed the book.
I love the imagery here, and the photo goes along with it so well. Even more, I love your word choices: "Satin and lace splinters the air" is a beautiful phrase. Small nitpick: grammatically speaking, wouldn't it be "satin and lace SPLINTER", not "SPLINTERS"?
ReplyDeleteWell, look at that, I fixed my "reply" not working issue. Thanks again for the grammar suggestion. I love critique.
DeleteI'm totally on the same page with Flippa -- I loved that Paso Doble line, and the image of satin and lace splintering the air comes across perfectly with that. This was well done!
ReplyDeleteThanks Brian. My Dancing With The Stars addiction coming through. :)
Deletedk
This is beautiful! Thank you for stopping by my blog and your thoughtful comment. Love your blog.
ReplyDeleteThanks Debra. Trying desperately to get some discipline in writing.
Deletedk
Love that first line :3 Short and sweet.
ReplyDeleteI too love that bit about the suicidal Paso Doble; really great images here.
ReplyDeleteenjoyed this nice imagery. I think splinters is okay - the s makes the poem "sound" better more like satin and lace splintering- i imagine them part of one piece of clothing :-)
ReplyDeleteI love a grammar debate. :)
DeleteA good book can take us to so many different places. I like how that last line draws us back to reality. (And I wouldn't have noticed the person in the picture without the story!)
ReplyDeleteVivid imagery! The ending is abrupt, yet filled with so much more than what is said.
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up this week! I love this, and I love the grammar debate above. Your poem is a little too short, though. Our minimum is 33 words. :-( We're just trying to pull a little extra out of you. Hope you'll come back for the weekend and bring us a few extra.
ReplyDeleteOMG-didn't even re-count after edits. Sheesh.
ReplyDeleteYep, next time. Thanks
dk
Missed by one word - WOW
DeleteVolatile and disturbing. Nice work.
ReplyDeleteThx Gabriela. I like 'volatile.'
Deletedk
Counting with the edits kills so much time every week!!!
ReplyDeleteI love the name of the dance, which tells you I'm a DWTS freak too ... I really love the way the whole story feels black in such a yummy way.
That was great. It reminds me of something that was written by a poet who later committed suicide. I wish I could recall her name. Now I have to go look - just a sec - it was Alfonsina Storni. Google her bio - interesting.
ReplyDelete